June 08, 2021
What is your deepest fear?
Words are powerful. I'm glad words moved me since I can remember. I'm happy when I stumble upon a piece that inspires me. But, to be honest, I am easily moved by words. Nevertheless, the ones that stay with me are highly appreciated, such as this poem by Marianne Williamson.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us;
It's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson
It's a beautiful poem. One of my favorites, so I figured I'd share it.
I have displayed the whole poem, but the highlighted part is the cut that made its way to introduce itself to me.
I first came across this poem after having watched the film Coach Carter when it was released. Since then, some of these thought-provoking words have resided in my head.
When I first heard and read the words, I was just a kid afraid of just about everything. The term "fear" is what made sense to me at a young age. I was always thinking about what my deepest fear was. But then, I would revisit the thought that "we were all meant to shine."
But what happens when everyone is shining? There's a fear of being left behind comes into play—the fear of not shining always scared me. That was me as a kid. Shining was quite tricky for me. I had no extraordinary talents, was shy, ignorant, and just scared to talk to people, including my own family. But yet, I managed to pull through so many situations where fear played a part. Except for my fear of snakes. For some reason, I can't and have no interest in getting over that fear, probably because I'm so fucking scared of snakes.
I'm proud to say that fearing snakes is the only fear I've held on to. Other than that, I've managed to control fear in so many ways. Why? Or how?
Going from kid to young adult, I believed that anything is possible. "We are all meant to shine" is an idea I treasure. I wish that I would've been allowed to play with that idea more as a kid. I was a dreamer but never acted on any dreams as a kid. It was a practical way of being. But then, as a young adult, just said "fuck it" to more than 50% of my practical reasoning in my brain. And then I proceeded to do try out some crazy ideas, and it's still going on. And I don't regret it.
But now, as an adult, here's where I would've changed some things. I believe I played small on some occurrences in life. I should've played BIGGER or should've revisited this poem on a weekly basis.
As an adult, these are the words that I want to live by.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
I feared many things and people. And then, when the shining effect began, the "shine" was not remembered. The shine was nonexistent. And all because I didn't play bigger.
From now, I only want to play big, move beyond my fears if any arise, and serve a grand purpose in whatever comes my way. I aspire to the BIG ENLIGHTENMENT.
Now I am fully aware of what this means. I shouldn't hold a garden snake but one of those monsters that go around my neck while surrounded by people laughing at me for shitting my pants.
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